Reflections On A Weird Year And Moving Forward

2020 was a strange year for the world as we've all tried to cope with the fallout from the pandemic. With the year over and a new one just begun it got me reflecting on the interesting journey my family and I have been on.

My wife and I were teaching abroad in Saudi, having packed up in Summer 2019 with the intention of being abroad for quite a few years. We had hoped to see the world, show our girls different cultures and societies and hopefully save for our future too whilst enjoying the perks of international life. However, the pandemic had other plans…

With the rising Covid cases across the world, different countries undertook a variety of strategies, some which worked better than others, which we know now with retrospect - after all, who would have thought leaving airports open with no temperature or health screening during rising Covid cases would be a bad idea that would come back to haunt us?

In Saudi, lockdown was very strict, with all but essential travel restricted and schools closed on 9th March. This meant all schools in the country had to undertake distance learning. Luckily enough, our school had been going paperless for a couple of years and so the technology and systems were in place to transition pretty smoothly.

Over the next 2 months our school held meetings on Google Meet whilst we teachers planned bite-sized lessons which the pupils could access in their own time and do independently. We assessed their work and offered feedback on the online learning platform SeeSaw and met online with our students for 6 hours a week to discuss their work, as well as their physical and mental health. It was wonderful to see the children, as well as their pets, stuffed toys and various accoutrement they felt compelled to share, as it kept that teacher-pupil relationship alive during a time when people could feel isolated. Considering the circumstances, our school did well in ensuring the children had a cohesive system in place for delivering the curriculum whilst also keeping pupils engaged with communication from us teachers. 

However, I'm not gonna lie- it was intense and incredibly demanding. My wife and I sometimes worked 18 hour days as the workload was incredibly gruelling at the beginning. Being a new development, the goalposts were often changed and we would have to pivot to new ideas and plans which were being forged by the senior leadership team who were responding to circumstances as they appeared. These innovations had to be implemented with very little lead time but with having our own two children at home, it made delivering what was demanded all the more difficult. This was heightened as the facilities in the compound were closed, social distancing enforced heavily with crippling fines and the balmy 40+ degree weather meaning you couldn't stay outside for too long. Our children, and others in the compound, could not use the swimming pools, play centre, sports facilities, parks or other play facilities which made the days long, but as we had a live-in nanny we had it easier than many of our colleagues and others in the wider community. With time, my wife and I (and I believe all of my colleagues--though I don't wish to speak on their behalf) persevered and we gradually fell into a pattern and things became easier. 

What I noticed was that, after the initial whirlwind of direction and activity, distance learning let us thrive as teachers as we were left to plan as a grade and this allowed us to show our true professionalism and expertise. In fact, I'd say that some of the distance learning lessons were some of the best and most cohesive I'd taught over the year as we had to mainline the learning and put the various, works-in-progress Common Core, 'Student Directed Learning' and 'educationally progressive' trends to one side. Being taken away from this 'progressive accretion' meant that the lessons taught were more focussed and streamlined with no ‘filler.’

I'm not a Luddite but some of the initiatives I've had to go through as a teacher over the years have been counter-intuitive and this school was no different in that regard. Not everything worked but as this was a top-down led school with a singular vision, we had to adhere to the strict guidance we were given.

When flights were available, we flew back to England to complete the final several days of Distance Learning from home, safe in the knowledge that if flights were shut down we were close to our nearest and dearest. I wrote about that in a post in May 2020, which was the last one about our work and life and Saudi. This is the follow up and a ‘state of play’ up to now.

Our Summer in Devon was great as we had the beach and moors pretty much on our doorstep.

Our Summer in Devon was great as we had the beach and moors pretty much on our doorstep.

Our school closed for the end of the academic year on May 21st 2019 and we were informed that we would have to wait and see about what would happen as regards the virus, the financial fallout and its effect on enrollment and thus the implications for our jobs. The international teaching circuit is heavily affected by financial instability and when the economy takes a downturn so do the pupil retention rates at fee-paying schools. There was a real fear that many student would leave the school or be unable to return (due to flights not being available) and so a sense of dread filled much of the teaching staff. We were hopefully going to be informed about our jobs mid-August 2020 but this late date meant that we would have passed the point for most job applications for teaching here in the UK and also meant that most international jobs would have gone too. Some schools had released some staff with severance packages and an apology but our school took the sensible approach of 'wait and see' but this meant that we had an uncertain future.

Over the next few months we waited and watched the spread of the pandemic, the fluctuating spikes in infection rates and Covid hotspots, reflecting on if this would affect our livelihood and Saudi home. The school was not very forthcoming or communicative about what was going on and what kind of position they were in as, to be honest, they didn't know themselves which way the wind would blow and so… we waited.

During this protracted period of time we were in a state of limbo and didn't know what to do. The constant waiting took its toll on our mental health but we are fortunate in that we are key workers and that allows us at least some guarantees of work in the teaching marketplace should the situation go LIFO (Last In First Out). However, from a familial point of view this was a terrible position as our girls didn't know what was going on in terms of their schooling and we couldn't make any financial decisions as we didn't know what would happen:

  • Would our girls go to the local or Saudi school and what would this look like? 

  • Would schools be safe if we went back? 

  • Would we be penalised for not being able to get back to Saudi because we left? 

  • Would we be given any severance? 

  • What would our references look like? 

  • Would Boris continue to be a muppet and handle the situation badly yet still deny it whilst speaking nonsensical Latin phrases to show off his privilege? 

A couple of months later the school asked us to fill in some staff questionnaires to get a feel of our mood. So we had a decision to make:

(i) be honest and say we would honor our 2 year contract but state that we were concerned about what the school would have in place for our daughters whilst we were doing distance learning which might include a live lesson component, or,

(ii) be honest and say we didn't want to return due to rising Covid numbers in Saudi and then be told that we had broken the contract and suffer the harsh financial  penalty? 

As you can see, we were very conflicted and my wife and I oscillated back and forth between these two options but we filled in the questionnaire as honestly as we could saying we wanted to complete the two years but that the welfare of our daughters would take precedence; after half a year out of school we couldn't in all good conscience have our daughters' learning left as a question mark. 

And so we waited until we were informed on 21st August that we were to be released from our contract. It was a shock but also a relief to be honest. At the time, we were disappointed that we had been let go as we'd had a tough year but we had wanted to finish our time and say goodbye to colleague and friends. Also, as a parent you want your children to have a sense of closure, for them to say thank you and bye to the friends they had made but this would not be possible now, except through online means. During such uncertain times we were glad to be home near friends and family and the NHS.

The lateness of our termination had us scrabbling to get our girls into school, buying a car, looking for jobs, looking at housing etc. All pretty intense stuff at the best of time let alone during a pandemic but we were given a fair severance so that helped alleviate any short-term financial concerns. Also, we had made some preparations for this eventuality and so we put that into action. We had considered going to teach abroad in Brazil (like seriously, there was a job going… I’m not just saying that as in old films it’s where all mobsters and criminals would run to to get away from the Feds) but we decided to settle in Devon as Bolsanaro was handling the pandemic nearly as badly as Trump. Also, Devon was where we planned to settle in some undetermined 'future' so why not do it now? With the beach and moors nearby we had beautiful landscapes to explore as well as the in-laws nearby, but you can’t have everything eh? (I kid, I kid!)

Meanwhile, our friends and colleagues in Saudi helped pack our villa for us and sent our belongings via shipped freight, for which we were eternally and immeasurably grateful. However, this meant that for a few months we would not have our belongings and the stuff we had left in England before our international departure in the summer of 2019 was in storage… in Kent!

However, the priority for my wife and I was to get our girls settled into school as it had been 6 moths since they had last been in a classroom with their peers. My eldest daughter settled in at the local two form mixed year school really well as the SLT knew about what had happened to us regarding Saudi and the nurturing school environment was to get the children settled and address the issues that may have arisen after several months out of school.

My younger daughter meanwhile was a little more difficult to place as there were a few pre-school around but we didn't know which one to go for. We opted for 2 to see which one she liked the best, a pre-school attached to her sisters, she calls is 'Twin School' and another that was based a few miles away in a temporary porta-cabin structure as the original building had been damaged a few months ago due to a neighboring fire that broke out. The draw of this porta-pre-school was that it had pigs and donkeys and had a big focus on nature and singing, two things my daughter loves.

As for work, while I was waiting for my DBS police check to clear before getting myself out there to do some supply work to suss out the schools and figure out what was next, I undertook some online tuition and it kept me busy and our family afloat during this difficult transition. My wife, who is also a teacher (much better than I in my opinion) took the role of maintaining the house and looking after the kids as with the return to school and potential closures of bubbles, we had to have someone available at home. After being at work, this was a difficult transition but hopefully would only be temporary, at least until things got back to some kind of normality.

Once our children were settled, I finally got my DBS through in early October. I started to put myself out there via a supply agency and it was an interesting experience. I'm from London where teaching jobs are plentiful and abundant- opportunities as far as the eye can see. Here in the South West it's definitely not like that. Long term teaching jobs are rare as teachers stay until they retire or die, which is fine but it means lots of younger people leave for the bigger cities. Also, as I didn't want to travel for dozens of miles and I had the additional curse/ blessing of being an experienced teacher who was on the Upper Pay Scale which made me prohibitively expensive for many schools there were few roles out there for me. It got to a point where I even went for a Deputy Headship role, even though I’ve only ever reached middle management levels before. I think I could have done well in the role with mentoring and guidance but who wants that during a pandemic when the Head could go off ill? And so I didn’t get it due to lack of managerial experience but maybe that is something for less germier times for me to consider…

However, I haven’t minded it as it has meant I have had to hustle. In between the occasional TA supply job and rare teaching supply at mainstream and SEN schools I have been doing online tuition and making *sigh* content for my website. Now the supplying has been great as it has offered me an ‘in’ at schools and shown me insights into what schools are like as well as seeing good practice. In a way being out of a full-time teaching role was liberating as I didn’t know what was going to occur day to day. It was just my Mazda Sport 2 and I on the open road, taking in new places and learning more about this area that I know quite well but with no experience of the schools. In many ways I felt like a proper Millennial, doing loads of things whilst trying to see what sticks.

After my Honda Jazz, this Mazda 2 Sport was a bit of a power upgrade. I’m not gonna lie, I was scared to drive it initially but now I love it!

After my Honda Jazz, this Mazda 2 Sport was a bit of a power upgrade. I’m not gonna lie, I was scared to drive it initially but now I love it!

I worked at a SEN Autistic school for much of the later Autumn 2 term as a TA and occasionally as a teacher. This experience was great as I had to adapt my behaviour and teaching strategies and learned so much. I had the occasional interview or teaching role at other schools here and there but this SEN school was pretty much a constant and taught me a lot. I loved the experience, even though it was challenging and exhausting, as I developed new friendships with staff and forged bonds with many of the pupils, many of whom didn’t initially know what to make of me due to my appearance and cultural background. With time they opened up and accepted me and it led to some interesting conversations about identity. I had a pupil with autism say in all earnestness, “You’re blowing my mind, you’re asian but you speak english so well. And you say you were born in east London?” It was touching and it was moments like this that really made me smile as by having chats like this other kids would come up to me and tell me about their heritage, often whilst we were playing football at lunchtime. I also hope that by engaging with me I tackled some of the stereotypes and misconceptions they may have had about asians.

Just before Christmas I applied and got a fixed term teaching position at a mainstream school in Torquay which should tide me over for the Spring term. I don't know what's going to happen after but in a weird way I feel excited to be given an opportunity to find new positions this late in my professional career.

It’s been a heck of a year but in the words of the poem ‘Hope-o-potamus’;

There’ll be times in your life when your road will be tough.

You’ll be tempted to say that you’ve had quite enough.

There’ll be poeple that try and convince you to stop,

And you’ll feel that you’re just about ready to drop.

But those are the times when you’ve got to keep moving.

And with every small step you will see things improving…

I don't regret making the decisions my wife and I have made as, even though things didn't all work out, life is all about trying new things and shaking it up. This is what makes life interesting and exciting. It doesn't always go your way but in my view it's much better to do something and it not work out rather than have this feeling of regret or ennui at not embracing life to its fullest potential.

In life it’s the journey that’s worthwhile.

LINK- Straight Outta Quarantine: 14 Days in Blighty

LINK- Flying Home From Coronavirus

LINK- One Month on From Social Distancing in Saudi

LINK- Life in Coronavirus Lockdown Saudi

LINK- Life in the Times of the Coronavirus

LINK- Bahrain II: The Revenge

LINK- The Further Adventures of Anjum of Arabia in Saudi

LINK- High Tea and High Times in the Riyadh Globe

LINK- Reflecting on Life in Saudi Arabia After 5 Months

LINK- Life in Saudi Arabia 3 Month On

LINK- An English Geek in Saudi Arabia

LINK- Video Gaming In Saudi Arabia

Carry On Caravanning

We've been in Devon for just over 2 months now, initially staying at a B & B for 14 days to quarantine after our return from Saudi, and the subsequent time in a granny flat down at the bottom of the garden (like the Poddington Peas). And whilst it's been wonderful to have the beach on our doorstep and the moors nearby, it has getting a bit stale; a first world problem if ever there was one I know, however there is no denying that the routine has been getting to us. But, with my wife Jeannie’s birthday upcoming I thought the chance had finally presented itself for us to shake things up; have a champagne breakfast with fresh croissants from the local baker, a picnic in the moors and then top it off with a fish supper on the beach before retiring to a birthday blingtastic bedecked beach front hut for the night. I'd definitely get some Brownie points for that and wipe the slate clean of other, less ostentatious, displays of occasion from days of yore. Then a couple of days before all this, my wife said her parents were going to get their caravan set up near Bude and we should go for her birthday. Hmmmmm... out went the plans (for now at least) but I've stored them for a later date. Now some of you might think I've given the game away by writing it on this blog post but my wife doesn't really read my blog so that's okay, although also quite sad.

Now my wife has a rose tinted nostalgia attached to camping as in her childhood her family would travel around Europe in their car and camp at sites. It was a formative part of her youth and she fondly recalls the many (mis) adventures with her nearest and dearest with dewy wistfulness. 

For me however, camping and caravanning never appealed and it might be in part due to my childhood. Growing up, I remember my dad saying he just didn't get camping, "I left Pakistan for running water which didn't come from a standpipe and a comfortable bed, why would I want to go back to that?" Fair play I thought but during my formative years I did go camping and caravanning as my friends liked it as a cheap break away. Also, I’d also wanted to give it a go as I liked to experience different things myself before forming an opinion.

My first experience was as a 16 year old with the Youth Achievement Award Scheme, where my friends and I worked with underprivileged kids at a John Bosco camp where they did lots of fun activities to give them a break away from their parents. I liked the kids and enjoyed the rewarding week but I hated the cold tent, creaky camp beds, cold showers, the general feeling of griminess and the fact that, as a Muslim who could only eat halal food, my meals mostly consisted of salad in a bun as most of the meals were very meatastic and very pork-biased. Coming from Barking I had a certain level of refinement, £1 grade F halal chicken and chips if you please. 

This was followed by a camping trip to Snowden with work colleagues at the age of 18. We failed to plan adequately and arrived on an evening during a Bank Holiday weekend, only to find most of the facilities were closed and so we had to share a KitKat Chunky and a small packet of dry roasted nuts (as this was what we had buried in our bags) between the 4 of us whilst it chucked it down with rain in our 4 man tent. We did climb Mount Snowden in our inadequate equipment, so I'm proud of that, but I do remember praying so hard for warmth and a burger that I almost gave myself a hernia. 

As a 19 year old I'd gone to a static caravan in Cornwall and, later that same year, a canal boat in the south of France and found that those were actually pretty good. However pumping the water for the toilet and seeing your own poo floating in a flood of water before going down the toilet scarred me for life. I left it another 10 years and tried the static caravan experience again but didn't like it when my friends and I went to Cromer, a short distance from Norwich.

Since then, I've had the privilege of traveling around the world, staying in many different qualities and quantities of accommodation. So, when my wife suggested the caravan near Bude I girded my loins and thought I'd give it another crack! What could go wrong? I'd matured and maybe I'd like it now, like how I now actually like mushrooms and porridge after years of disliking them. 

The journey was just over an hour, 30 minutes of which were through lush green fields on either side as we drove through windy roads and lanes. 

When we arrived at the farm camp site in Devon but near the outskirts of Cornwall on July 15th, we saw that the surrounding area consisted of beautiful verdant hills. The sky was cloudy but it was a pleasant 20 degrees and hope and optimism filled our hearts. We drove past the main field, which had a dozen or so caravans with epic aspirational sounding names like ‘Explorer,’ ‘Wanderer,’ ‘Buccaneer,’ ‘Conqueror,’ ‘Sardine Tin’... Okay, I kid about the last one but you almost believed me right?  We drove on to the back field which had just one caravan, our caravan--the ‘Sterling Continental,’ a real beaut she was. She sat at the top of a hill and overlooked quiet lanes and gentle rolling hills. My in-laws were really taking social distancing to heart by perching the caravan here!

The view from the caravan park was stunning, gentle rolling hills and blue skies.

The view from the caravan park was stunning, gentle rolling hills and blue skies.

Once we'd alighted from the car my father in-law greeted us and explained the various systems to me; the water, electrics, gas and... the sewage. It was all pretty straightforward as the caravan was only a couple of years old and very modern, so a lot of the things were intuitive or automatic, or so he reassured me. That made me happy as I'm used to quite a sedentary lifestyle, for better or for worse, and I'm not used to manual labour so if a machine did it for me... great! I welcome our artificial intelligence overlords, especially if it helps keep my peachy, sensitive hands clean and soft. 

The thing I dreaded the most was cleaning the waste water and the sewage box each morning but apart from that I thought it should be alright. I'd have to take the two storage boxes to the waste area, empty them and clean the area with the standpipe. Gosh my dad was right all those years ago! 

My family and I established a rule of pooing only in the site facility toilets and peeing in the caravan toilet as I didn't want to empty out poos each morning. My old nightmares of pumping the toilet to see floating spinning poos wasn't going to emerge again after 12 years of laying dormant. Now we haven't been using public facilities during this scare for obvious reasons but I'm not gonna lie, the facilities were actually too notch. The caravan park we stayed at was very well maintained and due to the Covid-19 pandemic, immaculately cleaned and maintained. It only allowed one person in and when the person exited, one of the site workers would go in and clean it up. I didn't know how they did it but they were like ninjas, swooping in after we'd gone to the toilet. We saw them a lot as my youngest daughter is being trained to come out of nappies so we had a lot of phantom poos but it was all part of the process. 

For the first night we stayed on the campsite and played football and bat and ball. The girls enjoyed being able to run around, gamboling carefree on the grassy field whilst we sat in the 'grandad chairs' (sun loungers), drinking a lovely cold drink and admiring the wonderful view whilst enjoying the peace. The hours passed by pleasantly and as the time hit 7 pm, we all showered, had our dinner and got the girls ready for bed. We transformed the interior, changing the two seating areas into the 'master bed' and bunk beds. The girls didn't settle and as the time hit 11pm we knew it was going to be a long night, and it was.

The next day was my wife’s birthday and for this momentous occasion we put up a 'Happy birthday' banner, blew balloons and had a delicious handmade (not by me, I can't bake for toffee) buttercream and jam cake for breakfast. It's very hard to maintain an element of surprise in a tiny caravan but it was a sweet celebration with Jeannie assisting in putting up the decorations for her own birthday. We then completed our morning ablutions and I went about completing the tasks of fetching fresh water, getting rid of the waste water and toilet tray unit. I was nervous as it was the first time I'd ever done it and didn't want to do it wrong and end up in poop creek but luckily, it went alright and no-one was harmed. We then went to Widemouth Beach, which was very wavy, so there were lots of surfers and body boarders. It was a gloriously sunny day and we had a picnic on the beach. The girls loved running around on what was a pretty quiet beach.

After that initial day, the holiday became easier as we got into a routine. Over the next few days we went to a few different beaches including Sandymouth and Summerleaze, ate ice cream and caught up with some old friends. Having a child of their own meant our kids were entertaining each other and catching up whilst we adults discussed the pains of the pandemic, future prospects and possibilities- all pretty heady stuff but the delicious vegan BBQ helped though. On our final day, we were able to have a socially distanced reunion as two of our friends from Cambodia lived nearby and we sat and had tea, discussing how much things had changed over the past 8 years or so whilst reminiscing.

Sandymouth had lots of rockpools.

Widemouth had stunning views on the coastal walks.

Widemouth had stunning views on the coastal walks.

Sunset at our caravan site.

Sunset at our caravan site.

And so it was that after 6 days we departed for home, happy with our break away. I had a great time and have a new found appreciation of the wonderful British countryside and coasts. I'd overcome my fear of chemical toilets and enjoyed the simpler life and it was sweet, for a while at least. I think we’ll be back soon but not I’m not sure I’ll be rushing out to get a caravan anytime soon though, no matter what Jeannie says.

LINK- Our ‘New Normal’ v1.0

LINK- Let’s All Create A ‘New Normal’

LINK- Straight Outta Quarantine: 14 Days in Blighty

Our 'New Normal' v1.0

So, tomorrow marks the day that pubs open in England which is a good a marker of any that 'normality' has arrived in Blighty. When they've dubbed it 'Super Saturday' and the HM Treasury tweets 'Raise a glass' you know that social distancing may be difficult to maintain but we’ll see. I hope people are sensible and do the right thing whilst grabbing a pint.

Not the best tweet in the world…

Not the best tweet in the world…

You'd think that the 4th July reopening of pubs, restaurants and bars means that the British government have nailed the virus here in England but with at least 44,000 deaths and the R Number (reinfection rate) oscillating close to or above 1 is some places, we are most definitely not out of the woods yet. I'm remaining cautiously pessimistic as our nation has not covered itself with glory through this pandemic but I hope I'm pleasantly surprised. No amount of jingoistic nonsense, harkening back to past glories or Latin gobbledygook from our fearless leader is going to take the tragic number of lives lost away.

However, before we tentatively move into 'new normal' v1.0, I want to reflect on what I've been doing with my time in lockdown, to save it for digital posterity.

I've caught up on most of my cult DVD sets and series. I'd built up quite a collection of rarities, oddities and just strange DVDs from my many visits to Computer Exchange and now I've seen most of them, which is nice. There's been some great pleasures such as BBCs ‘Day of the Triffids’ but also great WTF moments (but in an awesome way) with ‘The Singing Ringing Tree’ .

I've finish many video games from my pile of shame including Spiderman, Shadow of the Tomb Raider, Uncharted: The Lost Legacy, Call of Cthulhu, Panzer Dragoon and A Plague Tale: Innocence . I'm now working through Skyrim (still after a year) and Control but still have God of War and Horizon Zero Dawn to start.

I've read loads of books, especially on social issues like the rise of suffragettes, flappers, the creator of the monster fromCreature from the Black Lagoon and issues of race and Black identity. I feel that I've grown and matured, but to balance this I've also read some tween graphic novels so that's equilibrium achieved. I've liked holding actual books in my hand as it's been a comfort to snuggle up in bed and immerse myself in the writing. 

When I can't sit and read, due to having two kids running around, I have been listening to Audible as I have had a digital pile of shame in my library, about 15 books of varying length for over a year. I find 1.3x a good speed to listen to things generally, as I'm a fast reader and this pace suits me as it makes me chuckle as some narrators start to sound like Alvin and the Chipmunks. I've been able to work my way through several books this way. 

I've been trying to improve my posture as I have looked like Mr. Burns and had the makings of "A mighty fine hump". So, between my sleep apnea machine, my octogenarian Floridian walking shoes and my posture fixing I'm an old man in a (nearly) middle aged man's body. 

I've worked extra hard to create lots of articles *sigh* 'content' for the website and it's been a joy to do. I love getting my thoughts and feeling out on this website and even though I don't get all that many hits, I find it therapeutic, like knitting, whale song or matcha for the soul. 

I've been watching a sheesh tonne of Netflix, where we've binged Dead Like Me and Awkward, as well as watching Disney + and the straight to DVD sequels that the company plopped out in the late 90s/early 00s like Mogli's Revenge, Aladdin 4: Rub Me the Right Way or 102 Dalmatians: Doggy Style. Okay, I kid about the titles but there are some horrendous Disney sequels out there. I've not been the biggest fan of them but my girls like them just fine. 

I've been listening to lots of classical and instrumental music as I find it sublime and  majestic; it enraptures my soul. The music transports me with its ethereal notes to another times, place, realm. Much of the music moves me and of particular note are:

Taverner- The Lamb- Kings College

Vaughan Williams-Fantasia on a Theme of John Tallis 

And whilst not classical, I've been listening to these stunning tracks on loop:

Olafur Arnauds- Nyepi (Voce8 version)

Jon Hopkins- Scene Suspended

Pauline Oliveros- The Last Time

Much time has been spent working out the most efficient way to sleep on a sofa bed as my wife and daughters share the one actual bed in the bedroom. I haven't minded as I've had a couple of hours to myself to play games, read, listen to music or whatever I like as long as I remain quiet so as not to wake them. Neck ache and a curvature of the spine are a small price to pay for quiet time as a parent. 

I've been listening to podcasts, especially Desert Island Discs, Louis Theroux's Grounded and Dermot O'Leary's People, Just People. I've rediscovered that I actually like people, but only from afar so social distancing works in my favour.

Oh, and in between doing all this I've been spending, at the time of writing, 6 weeks (since we arrived in England) day and night with my lovely family where we've:

  • Climbed Haytor in Dartmoor,

  • Going to the beach when very few people are there,

  • Decorated, grown grass and maintained ‘My Fairy Garden' with my daughters,

  • Spent an indecent amount in Hobby Craft to keep our kids busy with paint your own pottery kits, glitter, stickers, water colors and markers,

  • Cooking and baking as a family (Jeannie insists I talk about her cookies, which were in all honesty amazing.... I'm not just saying that as there'll be some repercussions otherwise, honest)

Teignmouth Beach has been a bit of life saver for us and it has rarely been busy.

Teignmouth Beach has been a bit of life saver for us and it has rarely been busy.

So, all in all, whilst it's been a challenging few weeks in England, time has passed by quite quickly and I've actually had a pretty enjoyable time of it. I have some trepidation with the opening up but we'll see what tomorrow brings.

Stay safe and my the odd be ever in your favour.

Stay safe and my the odd be ever in your favour.

Let's All Create A 'New Normal'

*I usually post light-hearted posts but this is a little heavier. Not ‘French art-house’ heavy but heavy-ish. You have been warned. Also, no offense is intended so cool any jets before coming at me bros. That said, Cummings has acted like a complete muppet*

If you watch the news, are linked by social media or participate in any online discourse you’ll notice that there does seem to be a divisive and often aggressive stance presented about pretty much any topic. The inventor of the world wide web, Sir Tim Berners-Lee, stated a couple of years ago that, "Humanity connected by technology on the web is functioning in a dystopian way." He decried the "outraged and polarised tone and quality of online discourse", and this was before something like the Covid-19 pandemic happened. So how is the world functioning under this 'new normal' and what does it mean?

Whilst there have been many scenes of packed beaches, many have remained quiet and when people have been there they have socially distanced. Not everyone who goes to the beach is a ‘Covidiot’ and labelling them doesn’t help wider discourse.

Whilst there have been many scenes of packed beaches, many have remained quiet and when people have been there they have socially distanced. Not everyone who goes to the beach is a ‘Covidiot’ and labelling them doesn’t help wider discourse.

In much of the left and centre-left media I've read, I've been told how ‘Covidiots’ are putting others in danger. The probably Brexit voting, bog roll hording gits are gonna cause a second wave and kill many more people by their selfish actions. The sods probably bang their pans on the Thursday for the NHS and carers whilst continuing to put them in danger through their actions. How dare these people enjoy the beach, socially distancing for the most part, and contributing a little to the devastated local economy? The bastards. They're not like you, me or our circle of friends who are sensibly self-isolating and waiting for the scientific evidence to bear out.

The right and centre right media meanwhile have a very different narrative; after more than 8 weeks in lockdown we must get back to a 'new normal.' The science by SAGE (the government's advisory scientific body, so totally impartial then…) says we're probably fine sending Year R, 1 and year 6 kids back to school on June 1st, after all younger kids are less likely to get the virus. They may spread it but it probably won't be that bad. Also, younger kids are well known to respect social distancing guidelines and definitely know what 2 metres looks like as they learned it in school. Talking about schools, they have most definitely been closed and those lazy/ heroic teachers have been chilling at home/ working heroically to support/ letting parents suffer with no support/ too much work. The sods! Yes, there may be a second wave, but the impact to Britain's economy would be more devastating and in the long run this will lead to longer term problems that will be worse than death, like a disparity between rich and poor students. Won't anyone think of the kids? C'mon folks, we're Great Britain, we won the war and we will win this because we're a sovereign island nation who don't need no-one else. *sassy finger clicks* Let's get Brexit done!

The centrists are seen as the worst in many peoples eyes as they have a nuanced approach. They've isolated for the duration of lockdown but have recently gone out to get some fresh air or gone to the beach, if they live near the coast. Contrary buggers, choose a side! This is no time for shades of grey, it's only black and white. A great former U.S. president, George W. Bush said, “You're either with us or against us.” So choose your side you mealy-mouthed muppets!

I'm obviously taking the piss here (just to be clear) and speaking in very broad terms but the general gist is there; whatever your political views or leanings, the narrative being told is it feels better to negatively judge people who have differing views and think of them in derogatory terms, de-humanising them.

I think after 12 years in which we've had extreme economic hardship due to the 2008 crash, the ‘Hostile Environment’ immigration policy that led to the Windrush Scandal, a general demonising of foreigners and 'low skilled' workers amongst certain political groups and media interests during Brexit, and a raised awareness of inequality due to the tragedy in Grenfell, we need to rebuild the sense of community and trust in this fractured country.

This was Teignmouth riverside at 11am on Saturday. Not packed and the people who were there were socially distancing for the most part.

This was Teignmouth riverside at 11am on Saturday. Not packed and the people who were there were socially distancing for the most part.

A lot of it is to do with social media and media as a whole. We are hyper-connected and in the news cycle and social media filter and algorithm, all we hear are the shrill extremes of the bell curve, the extreme views from either end of the spectrum. However, most people are in the middle without the extreme views of whatever is being discussed; "You're either with us or against us" both sides cry, when actually most people are neither. The extreme views of the bell curve become the norm and people who don't feel those extremes feel left out and marginalised whilst the shrill just get 'shiller.'

The problem of toxic comments comes from both sides of the spectrum, snowflakism is real on both sides and not just the reserve of the left. On the Web it's very difficult to have a sensible centrist conversation so why shout into the wind? I look back at some of the thoughts and opinions I have shared over the years and I stand by many but looking back reflectively some were antagonistic and reactionary, being written in anger, fear and other heightened feelings that I felt at the time.

I dare to dream… of a world where people aren’t complete muppets to one another, and they listen respectfully…

I dare to dream… of a world where people aren’t complete muppets to one another, and they listen respectfully…

All that this polarising rhetoric does is take the emphasis away from thinking clearly about how disorganised and confused the government response has been. This is not a post to bash the Tory's, however no matter how you cut it the death count is tragically high and this is largely due to the lack of true leadership shown and inadequate preparation, no matter what they say in those daily briefings. Shaking hands with patients who had Covid-19 shows the arrogance exhibited by Boris. Churchill, who he would like to emulate, had a lot on his plate but I don't remember him being arrogant enough to go out to a field, pulling his pants down and mooning the Luftwaffe during the Blitz. Informed choices and smart decisions (and a little luck, for sure) won the day for Churchill, but for Boris, alas, the emperor has been found to have no clothes on. Except when he's defending Dominic Cummings, but then we know who's really wearing the trousers in that relationship.

As I noticed when walking along the beach in Shaldon, Devon today on Tuesday 2nd June 2020, people are making good choices for the most part. However, I know from a few friends across the country who live next to the coast that there are many people a who are not following social distancing guidelines and are ignoring protocols by grouping together at beaches. They should be dealt with properly by the authorities, but not everyone on the beach should be tarred with the same ‘covidiot’ brush. I’ve also seen choice photos of other beaches taken at angles which make the people look closer together than they really are or even old photos pre-pandemic of packed beaches claiming to have been taken during the pandemic, these do not help build trust in what is being communicated online.

That's why we have many people not believing everything they read or see in ‘mainstream media’ but rather seeking ‘alternative media’ to get their ‘news’. Many people believed alternate dimension blood drinking lizard botherer David Icke with his 5G conspiracy and lit up phone masts. It's a shame we've never had anything like this untested, unknown technology before, like maybe 4G, 3G, 2G... . It's also why if there is a vaccine many people will elect not to take it, some for valid reasoned medical reasons and some because they saw a YouTube video by a random guy talking about its dangers from his shed and he seemed legit so they told their circle of friends, some of who are flat earthers and believe that man never really landed on the moon. We are through the looking glass here people!

Since when has it been the norm to believe more in conspiracy theorists than scientists? It's no coincidence that the countries with the strongest trust in institutions like the police, scientists and politicians have had the most cohesive and effective response against the spread of Covid-19. With a government that specifically stated that "People have had enough of experts" what else did they expect when people turned to other sources of information and questioned those they should have been listening to in this critical time? This erosion of trust has caused huge problems and meant that the messages are not being received with trust, or they are being interpreted in different ways.

So, where do we go from here? Well, first off we need to stop judging and belittling people (apart from conspiracy theorists as they need to be called out on their more outlandish nonsense), either through passive aggressive virtue signalling on Facebook, Twitter or any other medium as it doesn't help, it just entrenches those views. Also, some flash in pan hashtags often don't help, they're often just a short term trend. #BeKind was a wonderful idea but was soon forgotten whilst the whole Facebook forwarding of "I can say that I've stayed at home since lockdown began, have you" is not helpful as it assumes people are all in the exact same position. How about key workers or carers who don't have that luxury? You don't know what people are going through and shaming them does not help. People may be going through some mental health issues, having difficulties supporting their children or maybe they are looking after someone with a disability. For many financial hardship has grown, even more since austerity 'ended' and there are harder times to come with the unemployment rate skyrocketing and expected to grow even more. So to assume that everyone should behave in one way is unfair, I mean don’t drive to a castle 60 miles away with your 4 year old son strapped to the back of the car to ‘check your eyesight,’ but do follow the spirit of the guidelines to help wider society and don’t be a selfish git.

Simply put, there is not one good way to create the' new normal' but could it please be one in which we respect difference and appreciate each other and maybe listen.

Politicians and political commentators must look at how they are contributing to an ‘us’ vs ‘them’ narrative which has led to populism sweeping across the world. There’s nothing wrong in populism but some of the statements which are shown in the 24 news cycle and shared online, pervade society and give credence to certain xenophobic, racist, homophobic beliefs. This adds fuel to the fire and all it takes is one spark to ignite the flames for discord and discontent. I could place any number of quotes from Donald Trump, Nigel Farage, Boris Johnson or many other politicians in here but I won’t as by cherry picking a few points without context, I’d be doing what I am railing against.

I don’t know how to end this as what is going on in the world is too big to grapple with here but I think the ‘new normal’ should have a simple overarching rule to follow: Be the best that you can be as a human being and make informed decisions that help create a fairer world for all people, irrespective of colour, creed, religion or orientation. Difficult, I know but dare to dream…

LINK- On And On And Colston ( Or, How We Kinda Sort of Learned to Talk About the Legacy of Colonialism and the British Empire)

LINK- Straight Outta Quarantine: 14 Days in Blighty

LINK- Flying Home From Coronavirus

LINK- One Month on From Social Distancing in Saudi

LINK- Life in Coronavirus Lockdown Saudi

LINK- Life in the Times of the Coronavirus

LINK- Bahrain II: The Revenge

LINK- The Further Adventures of Anjum of Arabia in Saudi

LINK- High Tea and High Times in the Riyadh Globe

LINK- Reflecting on Life in Saudi Arabia After 5 Months

LINK- Life in Saudi Arabia 3 Month On

LINK- An English Geek in Saudi Arabia

LINK- Video Gaming In Saudi Arabia

Flying Home From Coronavirus

With the school year almost over here in Saudi and the lockdown in the country meaning most of the facilities are closed for the foreseeable future, we had a tough decision to make:

1) Stay here in the relative safety of the compound and hope the facilities open up for our kids, who were going nuts and struggling in the heat which is due to get to 50 degrees soon, or

2) Fly home back to England with the highest death rate in Europe and hunker down in isolation in a granny flat in the in-laws garden.

Decisions, decisions.... but we decided on the latter as the promise of cooler climes, a change of scenery and access to a large garden was too tempting to pass up, especially if the lockdown was to continue for several more weeks.

Our two girls were done with Saudi as they couldn't do anything that they wanted to do, rightly so in the time of a pandemic, but when you are surrounded by beige constantly it gets you a little down. Behaviour and mental health become big factors and they were becoming more prominent as the 8 long weeks had dragged on. Our littlest barely wore clothes, which is no bad thing granted, but she also wasn’t being stimulated or entertained as both Jeannie and I worked on our Distance Learning plans and had limited activities and resources to occupy our children and keep them engaged. We had reached a plateau.

So, we bit the bullet and booked flights home for May 8th 2020 on a Saudia flight to Heathrow. Our plan was to get to London, pick up the rental car and drive down to Devon where we had our home base.

Packing up was interesting as we are hoping to come back to school but are not sure if we'll be allowed to fly back in August or even if we'll have jobs as the international teaching scene is very volatile at the moment with worries about numbers dropping in enrolments due to the worldwide economic slowdown and the oil price crash, which is a big factor here in Saudi. We packed the essentials and valuable but left much of our belongings in Riyadh, hoping to return to finish our second year or failing that, to return our school laptops and collect our personal possessions before deciding what to do next.

A few days before going to the airport we had to fill in an online form to be allowed to break curfew to get to the airport, it was a long process as the website was janky and kicked me out several times. However to travel without the document meant you could be fined up to £200, 000 or face jail time, shizzle just got real indeed! When the King orders a lockdown here, he means business and there's no flip-flopping.

And so, with the travel documents in tow we went to the airport and what struck me was how quiet it all was. Now Riyadh is not a massive hub like Dubai or Kuala Lumpur but it is quite busy generally but today it looked desolate, like a shopping centre on a midweek afternoon. It was so quiet that we were able to park up outside the terminal, a rare situation indeed. So, with masks covering our faces, gloves on and a change of clothes for when we got to the other side we went in and got checked in and through security within 10 minutes, a new record for us.

In Departures what struck me was the sheer sense of desolation. All duty free shops were closed and there was the solitary coffee vendor selling just 3 options of coffee, all with no syrup... This was lean fare indeed.

Markers on the floor demarcate 2 metres.

Markers on the floor demarcate 2 metres.

Walking to the Departures gate the usual suspects of travelers, serious business people, the loved up couples, the weekenders, the solo backpacker and the pilgrims were nowhere to be seen. Instead we simply had families trying to make their way home, carrying a couple of suitcases and car seats. Everyone was wearing masks and many wore gloves. It felt strange as in the compound we had been sheltered from much of this but now here it was, front and centre... This pandemic is changing the world and re-moulding it, into what? We don't know and won't know for a while but hopefully some good will come out of this tragedy which has claimed so many lives.

The queue for the London flight was crazy long and social distancing frequently went out of the window.

The queue for the London flight was crazy long and social distancing frequently went out of the window.

When it was time to join the queue for the flight I was surprised by how many people came out of the woodwork, the flight to London was pretty packed after all! People had social distanced but when it was the time to go, boy did they come together, funneling through the security checks (again). The close proximity to others continued for the duration of the journey as the plane is by design narrow and confined so there is no way you have have the designated two or so metres apart. However, to Saudia's credit, they gave everyone a pack of hand sanitizer, antibacterial wipes and tissues and sprayed the cabin with some insecticide. The food was packaged cheese and turkey ham sandwiches and a small bottle of orange juice, not great but enough to suffice for the 6 and a half hour journey. With masks constantly on our faces and copious amounts of antibac applied regularly we got closer to home.

The goody bag from Saudia was useful and practical to keep the virus at bay. Photo courtesy of Andy ‘Bowling King’ Thiel.

The goody bag from Saudia was useful and practical to keep the virus at bay. Photo courtesy of Andy ‘Bowling King’ Thiel.

All in all, it was a good a journey as could be expected but once the plane landed and the seat-belt sign went off, people went feral as always, rushing to get their bags and bunching together, impatient to get off. Bang went the social distancing that had been so rigidly followed...

Upon arriving at Heathrow terminal what stood out was how almost everyone was wearing a mask, but once we left the airport and stated our long journey to Devon, I saw few people wearing them. We picked up our rental car and Jeannie drove the whole way, we did the journey in just under 3 hours, it usually takes about 4 and a half hours, the traffic was non-existent!

Once we entered Devon it felt wonderful to be back, the fresh air, the verdant green grass and gorgeous vespertine river; it was good to be home! We got out of our clothes, had a shower and donned our masks to greet the family from afar and enter quarantine fo two weeks.

Shaldon really is stunning… the colours children, the colours!

Shaldon really is stunning… the colours children, the colours!

This is where I would probably end my story usually but a comedy of errors occurred the next day as we sought to return our rental car to Exeter and I feel the need to share it with you all as it was a comedy of errors.

Jeannie was going to drive the rental car and I would take my mother-in-laws cool Honda Jazz to pick Jeannie up after the drop-off. The Jazz hadn't been run in a while, due to my mother-in-law being quarantined as she is considered highly vulnerable, but the journey wasn't long so what could go wrong, right?

"It's not been run in a while so turn off the radio and other electronics" my mother-in-law warned me before I set off and I duly heeded her warning, making sure that just the essentials were running.

I put the location into Google Maps on my phone, which was freshly charged and showed 100%. Now I've had my Huawei P10 Lite for about 3 years, and over the past couple of weeks it's cut off randomly, saying it was out of power but the journey was only 20 mins or so, surely it could survive that… right?

So off we went, following each other when a giant delivery van came between us and I lost sight of Jeannie’s rental. No worries as I had my Huawei showing Google Maps, but then my mobile did the whole 'battery low' and shut down. Luckily, I caught sight of Jeannie's silver Kia and followed. "What luck" I thought as I got closer. We approached a roundabout and I followed the Kia to the 3rd exit, only for a car to beep me from behind as I exited the A road to gosh knows where. It was Jeannie… I had followed the wrong silver Kia and Jeannie had got off an exit earlier. I was on the adjacent road to where I wanted to be!

So, I was driving down an A road, going in the wrong direction with no idea where I was going apart from the general direction of Exeter.

I drove for about 15 mins until there was a suitable place to park and gather my thoughts. I turned off the engine to look through the glove compartment to see if there was an actual sat nav and there was! Oh mercy of mercies, thank you Jeebers I thought! However, when I turned the ignition nothing happened. The words my mother-in-laws had uttered echoed in my ears.

The car had packed up.

Bugger!

So there I was, stuck in the car park of a roadside diner which was closed, with a car that wouldn't work but the electrics would, and a phone that was dead. I surveyed my surrounding and saw a Texaco on the other side of a dual carriageway and knew that they'd have phone chargers. Maybe my phone would work if plugged in, retro style?

So, feeling like a right scally, I crossed the dual carriageways and bought a micro USB-C cable, a cable of which I have about 10 at home. Wire in tow I went back to the car, plugged it in, phoned an exasperated Jeannie and told her what had happened.

Then, just to chance it I tried the engine once more and it sprung to life. It seemed like my luck was turning around and boy was I thankful. After that it all went smoothly and I picked up Jeannie from the rental place. So all’s well that ends well.

On the way back to our beachside cottage I got to a thinking; I've had the privilege and opportunity to travel by air many times but I wonder how much longer the jet set lifestyle, budget weekend fares to Europe and summer holidays to the Med. will continue. When the world does start up again things are going to change and they should do as life as it stood wasn’t sustainable for us or for the planet.

To quote something I read once but can't for the life of me attribute or credit:
Humanity thrives on forward momentum, on the sense that we are improving: becoming better, smarter, deeper and more understanding and knowledgeable as a species. We must look forward and walk the path of hope, trusting that it sustains us when the darkness comes... As it inevitably will. It may have been a difficult year for many but let's walk forward in hope...

And at least 2 metres apart… Avoiding the flat earthers and MAGA diehards….

LINK- One Month on From Social Distancing in Saudi

LINK- Life in Coronavirus Lockdown Saudi

LINK- Life in the Times of the Coronavirus

LINK- Bahrain II: The Revenge

LINK- The Further Adventures of Anjum of Arabia in Saudi

LINK- High Tea and High Times in the Riyadh Globe

LINK- Reflecting on Life in Saudi Arabia After 5 Months

LINK- Life in Saudi Arabia 3 Month On

LINK- An English Geek in Saudi Arabia

LINK- Video Gaming In Saudi Arabia

One Month On From Social Distancing In Saudi

So, it's been precisely a month since our school closed and we have transferred to Distance Learning. Like a lot of the world, we've had to transition from recommended reduced socialisation to pretty much full-on lockdown. This has been a challenge as we have our kids at home with us whilst we continue to plan, mark and host office hours via Google Meet Up. It's been an interesting past few weeks for sure and in that time I've realised some interesting things:

It’s hammock time! Can’t touch this… or anyone in fact due to Corona Social Distancing.

It’s hammock time! Can’t touch this… or anyone in fact due to Corona Social Distancing.

- let me preface this early; I love my kids, I really do, but boy are they annoying and weird. They wake up extra early, demand a lot of attention and don't settle down to sleep at night… y’know, typical kid behaviour! Now I know that some people will be upset with me for saying my kids are annoying but to be honest, all kids are annoying. I love kids, otherwise I wouldn't be a teacher, but they need stimulation and socialisation and when they can't have either they play up, it's just a fact.

- Again, let me preface this early ; I love my wife, I really do, but she is annoying and weird too. Obviously,  we've lived together since we've been married, which is about 9 years, but we've had our own space daily what with going to work, hanging out with friends etc but when it's so intense 24/7 for 4 weeks + it's going to get annoying no matter who you're with. Of course my wife wouldn't say that same about me because my mum says I'm perfect and my mum isn't a liar.

- Distance Learning is hard. For those not in the know, Distance Learning is providing lessons and plans for the children and parents to access at home via the internet. This sounds great in principle as it means the children are not missing out on their learning, it gives parents something to do with their little ones during the looong days and as teachers, we can provide feedback and support. What's not to like?
Well, the amount of work schools are providing is swamping most parents. A lot of the concepts taught are going way over the kids' head as our video tutorials are supposed to be brief and on point, about 5 to 10 minutes, but when you are teaching a session on something as complex as weather, climate and natural disasters and you have very limited time, explaining the concepts and tasks becomes extremely difficult. Factor in that the Distance Learning timetable has meant that the amount of lessons are squeezed and you’ve got some incredibly dense lessons as you’re trying to throw in all the specific learning objectives for the unit. It’s a logistical nightmare and I worry that parents think I’m a crazy teacher who overplans to the hilt.

Also, throw in the fact that we are expected to do assessments and reports based on the work and it's a heady cocktail of work and confusion. Now don't get me wrong, I've seen some of my pupils thrive and continue to produce the high calibre work they did in school whilst others have grown as this is the kind of learning they like and I can see a marked improvement in their output, however there are others, who were very capable in class, who have produced very little at home due to distractions and other factors I’m sure. I've also had some of my Year 3 (grade 2) pupils produce work that is amazing, in fact it's so impressive that their handwriting has completely changed and their spelling is MENSA level. So either they've undergone a Flowers for Algernon style transformation and tapped into their higher consciousness and unleashed their full potential or they've been *heavily* supported by their parents.

- I've never spent so much time in the garden in my life. What with the country pretty much on lockdown, compound facilities closed (including the spa, pool and parks) and movement prohibited for most of the day, we've had to find our own forms of entertainment. The streaming services are fine but we feel guilty if we give our kids too much screen time. So, we've purchased a hammock, paddling pool, a barbecue, and lots of other paraphernalia for the garden and we are loving it as we are topping up vitamin D. On the down side, it is going to be Summer soon and temperatures hit about 40 degrees centigrade so there is only a small window of time. After that, we’ll be housebound.

- I'm devouring news feeds like no-ones business. I check the daily infection and death toll on the BBC, watch the Daily Show's take on the previous day's events and then balance it out by reading the right winged Spiked articles that talk about individualism and freedom but don't offer any solutions to this ongoing pandemic.

- People are creative and resourceful when there are restrictions placed on them. Historically, during times of hardship and economic crises,  economy of design due to costs and other restrictions (in this case, availability of resources, access to space and other people) has led to a flourishing of creativity. The videos, memes, songs etc created during the past few weeks shows that necessity to entertain and fight boredom is indeed the mother of invention.

-  Access to the Internet is not a luxury as many avocado and Millenial-hating boomers would state but a necessity; it is an essential utility. Okay it's no gas, electricity or water but imagine being stuck at home without being able to Facetime, WhatsApp or phone friends and family. Unthinkable for many. But even more essentially, imagine not being able to use the Amazon Prime or Netflix streaming services, download new games, listen to podcasts or Audible books. It like the worst case scenario of when you go caravaning or camping and there's no board games, books etc available so you have to resort to charades and other forms of savagery.

- People are weird. We see the best of people as they rise up to support each other and create an idea of the big society. Essential and key workers  have risked infection to ensure that people are cared for and services continue. It's all very stirring stuff, but then we also have people who hoard bog roll and hand sanitisers so swings and roundabouts eh?

So, with one month down and no end in sight I wonder what awaits the world. I’m an optimist though and think things’ll calm down soon enough. Let’s wait and see eh?

LINK- Life in Coronavirus Lockdown Saudi

LINK- Life in the Times of the Coronavirus

LINK- Bahrain II: The Revenge

LINK- The Further Adventures of Anjum of Arabia in Saudi

LINK- High Tea and High Times in the Riyadh Globe

LINK- Reflecting on Life in Saudi Arabia After 5 Months

LINK- Life in Saudi Arabia 3 Month On

LINK- An English Geek in Saudi Arabia

LINK- Video Gaming In Saudi Arabia

Bahrain II: The Revenge

It had been a crazy few weeks at school here in Riyadh. Since we’d come back from the Christmas holidays we hadn’t had a break. Last week we had an off timetable week at school, which was really tough on Jeannie and I, as we had to organise lots of ‘hand-on’ activities for our ‘Week Without Walls’. It was great fun but exhausting and when paired with having to complete progress reports too, well, we thought we deserved a break. Luckily, we had a long weekend penned on our calendar and so for our 3 day weekend we decided to go back to Bahrain for some sun, sand (beachside) and  Shirley Temples.

We were adamant that this time we would enjoy ourselves and not worry about the money and so this time we decided to drive there instead of flying, that way we wouldn't be spending £600 or so on flights for just 3 days and the spirit of Greta Thunberg wouldn't be haunting me.

Rightly so making us answerable for the future generations. Well done Greta!

Rightly so making us answerable for the future generations. Well done Greta!

The problem was that our car was a bit on a banger and there was no guarantee that it would make the 900km or so round trip. The dehydrated urine-like colour of our car was indicative of its quality and worth but we wanted a break out of Saudi and so we had to trust in the Gods that we would make it in one piece. And thus started our first leg of the 473 km journey across Arabia towards Bahrain.

We departed at 5:30am on the Friday morning, the start of the Islamic weekend, to beat the traffic we knew would build up. We knew that the journey would take about 5 hours in total and once out of Riyadh it would be one motorway all the way there, easy right?

Sunrise in the desert was beautiful.

Sunrise in the desert was beautiful.

Well, it didn't start too well. After just 45 minutes on the road, Leela did a vomit of quaranic proportions. I mean we had to stop at a drive-through McDonald's carpark, strip her off completely, throw the clothes in the bin, wipe her down with a pack of wipes, clean the vom off the car seat as best we could, place a towel on the car seat for Leela to sit on for the rest of the journey and redress her again. Bless her, she was a trooper and seemed to feel a lot better after that but the car stank of bile for the rest of the 5 hours so we drove with the windows down for the rest of the journey.

To brighten the mood we decide to play some music but the only thing we had in the car was the Disney Christmas CD. As we committed sacrilege by playing the Christmas CD, we drove through the beautiful Arabian desert. We passed camels, random towns, oasises (oasi-ed?) as Goofy sung in his dulcet tones about his jingle bells. I can honestly say that it was one of the most surreal experiences in my life and I remember thinking, the Lord wouldn't smite us would he?

As we drove on, we went past some burnt out cars and a deserted half built hotel with a rusty old ferris wheel in the middle of the desert which wouldn't look out of place in a horror film. Also we encountered a plague of locusts. I know many people may think that I'm exaggerating but I have video and photographic evidence of these events… the camera never lies… except when it uses filters, photoshop or other image editing software.

When we got to Bahrain we were so happy that we had made it- I said a quick dua in thanks for our safe if harrowing journey. Oh, to be in a place where road signs were followed and traffic lights were not a suggestion but enforced by law. Bliss!

We got to the hotel and had a wonderful day frolicking by the beach and sipping on our drinks. By 6:30pm we were all knackered and went to bed super early. It had been an eventful day and I think we were all glad that we had made it to the end of it. I went to bed watching Bird Box as I needed something light to end my day on.

The next day, Jeannie suggested we visit a local Hindu temple which was famed for its beauty. Anyone who knows my wife knows that she likes all things Indian, except me, her British-Pakistani hubby, so this was a must for her. So kids in tow, we got in a cab ready to culture it up. We were initially taken to the wrong temple but after some Google mapping and translating we arrived at the right place. We walked through some narrow streets that contained shops that reminded me of Green Street, East Ham but it was much cleaner, so like Southall but better.

When we found the temple it was undergoing some major renovations and whilst we were waiting to go in Leela had that look on her face that told Jeannie and I that there was a present in her nappy. Jeannie took her to the toilets and I chilled with Jasmine, passing the time by answering questions like "Why is God blue?" (she saw a giant photo of him and he was blue), "Why does he have an elephant head?" (Ganesh statue nearby) and "I like the praying in Saudi and God is in the sky but why is Jesus a baby?" So very interesting questions that would take a while to unpack but as Jeannie and Leela were taking a while unpack we did... To be honest I think I'd have preferred to be cleaning up Leela! These are difficult questions to answer without brainwashing a child into a certain doctrine or closing her down with my views and opinions.

After some time, Jeannie appeared looking shell-shocked and with a large suspicious stain on her top. "We have to go, Leela did a massive leaky poo and it went everywhere including my top. We can't go into the temple like this" she informed me. And so, our temple visit was cut short due to a number 2; Leela was really on form this holiday. As we walked back to the cab rank we bought garlands of jasmine to cover the pooey smell and some vittles for our forthcoming return trip.

The rest of the day was spent by the side of the pool in the hotel complex, eating pizza and ordering drinks. It’s a tough life!

That night we decided to go to the fancy on the river seafood restaurant. It did an all you can eat £30 buffet and had crab, mussels, calamari and a smorgasbord of fish cooked to order. We had a great time as a load of our teacher colleagues met up and the kids were running around, having the time of their lives.

At 8pm the kids were getting tired so we decided to leave and it was at this point that Leela projectile vomited near the fancy water fountain near the entrance of the restaurant. The staff were super kind and efficient as they mopped up and checked after our daughter. We got her to bed and she had a fitful sleep sleeping between Jeannie and I.

On the morning of our departure and 473km journey back to the Kingdom, we all ate a very light breakfasts and girded our loins for what promised to be an interesting journey, but y’know what? It actually went smoothly. The girls slept most of the way, there wasn't much traffic and the drivers weren’t too bad.

On the border I was quickly let through as for once racial profiling worked FOR me and I wasn't 'randomly selected' by my Muslim brethren. The only squeaky bum moment we had on the journey back was when the petrol was running low and I thought we'd have to depend on the kindness of strangers but might end up in a Wolf Creek type situation but luckily we found a petrol station just as the needle hit the last notch before empty.

Oh, we also found the most random McDonald's ever. It was about 250 km out from Riyadh and there were no cities or towns nearby. My immediate thoughts were why build it here, that's a heck of a commute for the workers there and is the breakfast still on? It was and I had a nice chat to the staff who seemed happy to talk to anyone, even though I only wanted to use the toilet and was being polite.

Seriously, this Maccies was miles from anywhere!

Seriously, this Maccies was miles from anywhere!

We also encountered the swarm of locusts again but they were much diminished and there were only a few of them flying around aimlessly, looking for food to plunder. I should have told them about the Maccies down the road...

So, we got home safe and sound and settled down for the afternoon. To de-stress and recover from the 5 hour drive I went to relax in the sauna, that same sauna that Jeannie had bought me a subscription to after our first Bahrain trip. Whilst in there I got reflecting.

Overall this was a successful trip and I thoroughly enjoyed it all. The misadventures will become the stuff of legend in our family I’m sure and adds to the crazy tapestry of our life. Our wonderful champagne coloured car had served us well and for that we were grateful.

We are hoping to go back to Bahrain again soon and hope third time’s the charm!

LINK- The Further Adventures of Anjum of Arabia in Saudi

LINK- High Tea and High Times in the Riyadh Globe

LINK- Reflecting on Life in Saudi Arabia After 5 Months

LINK- Life in Saudi Arabia 3 Month On

LINK- An English Geek in Saudi Arabia

LINK- Video Gaming In Saudi Arabia

High Tea and High Times at the Riyadh Globe

A couple of weeks ago I ‘celebrated’ my 39th birthday. I say celebrated but it was a weird one to be honest. My lovely wife had signed us both up for the school staff talent show a few weeks ago. She put us in for the Bollywood dancing, just to buck the stereotype, but then got shy after a couple of sessions and bailed leaving me in the group. I felt guilty as the numbers in the group were low so I stayed and on my birthday I performed on a proper stage to a paying audience of 750 school parents, pupils and peers in the evening. It was a great experience and I had a lot of fun but it wasn’t what I would have planned to do on my birthday. When the show had finished it was quite late-ish so I went home and went to bed. So yeah, a weird but memorable birthday for sure.

The cakes and snacks on offer were wonderful.

I think my wife was feeling guilty as later on that week she WhatApped our friends and arranged a fancy high tea at the Al Faisaliah Tower in Riyadh. For people not in the know, which I’m guessing is pretty much everyone as it’s not that famous a building outside of Riyadh, the tower is a giant pyramid with a globe stuck in near the top. It’s a beautiful but unconventional looking building, but what it promises is an unrivaled 360 degree view of the city and a perfect place to view the sunset whilst eating delicious food. So, what’s not to like, eh?

Well, after navigating the nightmarish roadworks that had blocked off most of the access points to the area we arrived at the front of the tower. A valet offered to park the Kia next to the latest, shiniest BMWs, Bentleys and Bugattis and I knew then that these were my people and I’d fit riiiiight in…

Entering the tower with my helium filled Elmo birthday balloon, we stepped onto the red carpet and I felt every bit the star my mother thinks I am. Maybe they’d heard about my amazing turn at the Staff Talent Show? We went through the x-ray tunnel and metal detector and my balloon was confiscated. Elmo is a code red apparently, or maybe they don’t want people to get high off the helium.

We then entered a cylindrical lift that felt like something out of a James Bond villains lair, all glass and chrome. A dapper concierge swiped his special card to allow the lift to move. We then met another concierge half way up and he swiped his special card to allow us further up into the building, into the plush lounge area. I thought that at the next stop I’d have to give a stool sample, shed some blood or sacrifice a lamb to be allowed in but luckily that was not required as we were finally there.

The panoramic view was instantly amazing. The sun shone on the Kingdom Tower which stood right in front of us; a bottle opener shaped building created by an architect with a ‘dry’ sense of humour! The other towering skyscrapers loomed large and the Mondrian-like grid road system was clear for all to see. The view was breathtaking and well worth the price of the 35 quid admission.

As we settled into our chairs, the waiting staff filed our glasses with fizzy water and loaded the table with serving towers laden with a selection of cakes, scones, chocolates, blinis (that’s small pancakes with fancy toppings) and savoury amuse-bouches (that’s small fancy food that tastes delicious). I was impressed as the food was scrumpdiddlyumptious but there were no cucumber, egg and cress or salmon paste finger sandwiches in sight. Worse still you had to go make your own tea! Well, that’s just not cricket is it? In all fairness they did have a tea caddy area with proper posh tea in their own linen-type teabags and a hot water urn but it felt weird making my own tea at a high tea.

However, this was more than made up by the fact that they had an international buffet going on. There was food from Japan; sushi, China; spring rolls, India; samosas and Germany; some savoury pastries and cookies. There was also a pimp chocolate fountain with a variety of foods and fruits you could skewer. So all in all, a very good variety of food that catered for all needs… except for those who like vegetables. It was a very beige tea, which I don’t mind on occasion, but for those wanting a rainbow plate of food jog on son…

So, as the sun set over the 3 or so hours we were there, my friends and I enjoyed the magnificent sunset and ate our fill. There were lots of laughs and lively discussions about work and life in Riyadh. My daughters loved the whole thing and ate their fill of chocolate covered fruit and marshmallow. The staff were very sweet and attentive and my daughters danced, ate and made friends with some of the other kids there.

The time whizzed by and by 6pm we bid a fond adieu to the place and made our way back downstairs, collecting the Elmo balloon on the way.

I have to say that my wife outdid herself by arranging this. Now I have to think of a way to repay her on her birthday. Maybe I’ll book her in for a standup session at the local comedy bar and then take her for a fancy Indian meal after… I’ve got a few months to figure out how to make her birthday as memorable as mine was with a sucker punch of an event first and then a sweetener.

LINK- Reflecting on Life in Saudi Arabia After 5 Months

LINK- Life in Saudi Arabia 3 Month On

LINK- An English Geek in Saudi Arabia

LINK- Video Gaming In Saudi Arabia

Reflecting On Life in Saudi Arabia After 5 Months

It's been 5 months since my family and I left England for Saudi Arabia to travel around the world, have new experiences and hopefully start to save for our future by getting new teaching jobs. It's had its ups and downs  but after the spiritual epiphany I had in the sauna in Bahrain, how are we adapting to life being slightly less frugal and enjoying life a bit? 

Well, Jeannie got me a membership to a spa and sauna soon after we got back to Riyadh! I think she read the Bahrain article, even though she said she didn't, and is either angling her way to convince me to buy that 1 karat diamond ring she's been after, or she was visited by 3 ghosts over the course of a night... Hey, it's Christmas so it could happen! Either way, the spa's been a gosh-send as after a tired day at the chalk face I go to the compound spa and steam, sauna and jacuzzi... I come out sparkling like a vampire from a popular elevated fan-fiction series.

So how have we changed, apart from sauna membership? Well, I'm eating caviar on toast daily, I'm not but it is available for £25 a small jar at the local mini-mart if I were so inclined. 

To treat Jeannie, I splashed out and bought her a foot spa as she's mentioned wanting one for a while. She's loving it and it's become a bit of a ritual for her to plug it in whilst the girls munch a post-school cookie whilst watching a cartoon on Netflix... Psych! She's used it precisely once and it's now sitting in the cupboard gathering dust like all footspas around the world... Next to the Breville Sandwich Toaster, Bread Maker and Jimmy Hoffa's body. 

We are eating out a little more, and not at fast food places but actual restaurants with cutlery with weight to it. We've had napkins that aren't disposable or made from course tissue paper and it feels like a revelation! A restaurant even gave us fresh bread and a salad for free and that was before we even ordered anything, so you know it's fancy when they can afford to give food away. 

We go to Starbucks a coupla times a week and my drink of choice is a matcha frappe with hazelnut syrup. That beats the greasy spoon 50p cuppa but does make me feel like a complete muppet  when I put the order in, but it is sooo tasty. Young Barking Me would knock the high pile of books from my hand aggressively and shout "What!" if he could see me now... But it gets worse…

We brunch. Yup, we go for brunches at cool hipster places; all asymmetric haircuts, distressed unvarnished odd wood furniture, bare brick walls and a shish tonne of plants. With my new freewheeling style, I have had unfettered food options and in one place I had eggs benedict, which is a couple of poached eggs on muffins, with a hollandaise sauce and a little bit of parsley on top. Pretty simple right? Well at £14 I'm guessing these were some elite eggs, maybe dodo... Hey, it's Saudi so it could happen! 

Recently, Jeannie and I went to the poshest cinema I've ever been to in my life, £56 for 2 tickets to see that cheesy Brit-com Last Christmas! The Vox Cinema at the Kingdom Tower (the one that looks like a bottle opener- ironic I know) had so much swagger with its modern art deco styling. Our remote controlled reclining seats were of the softest leather and had a night light, foldable food trays and satin blankets and pillows, Also, no lie, the popcorn came in super posh boxes and were carried to you on a freakin' tray by a waiter in a shirt and tie. With the press of a button you could get waiting service to your recliner, so you could order loaded nachos at your pleasure. This opulence even carried across into the toilet where there were golden bum guns. The toilet paper had also been poshified by the fact they made it into a triangle at the end... that's class right there for ya.  Different world man, different world.

Recently a group of friends from work and I have taken up bowling. We've been every Wednesday for the past 5 weeks and we've got pretty good. It's not flash or fancy and often we get a Burger King meal but I splash out on a large Whopper meal and I splurge that extra 1 sar (about 20p) for a sachet of spicy sauce... It's the little things yknow... in the Endz it was ordering that burger with an extra hash brown thrown in, but as money was tight that only happened on rare occasions... Now? Sauces as far as the eye can see. 

A little while ago, the family and I went to Dubai to catch up with an old work colleague and pal (Heya Gill!) and we went to the Marks and Spencer there and bought a few things for the kids and ourselves. Nothing fancy, just essentials like PJs, underpants and flip-flops and even though it's about a 30% markup on British prices, we didn't wince or complain. It's just a fact of life that imported goods from England cost a lot more here. We'd normally say it was too expensive and go to Blue Inc. instead but this time we said no more! So M&S goods it was for us! Huzzah! 

I've recently been to the Super Classico and the Clash on the Dunes, two major sporting events. Not only did I see Messi score a goal but I also saw Anthony Joshua regain the Heavyweight Boxing titles. In England these events would run into the hundreds, maybe even the thousand mark for the boxing but here it's much cheaper so why not go and give it a whirl eh? 

I'm not saying I've become snooty but at the boxing I had chips with truffle oil, yup, oil from truffles! Yknow, the expensive stuff that pigs love to root around for and eat. If it's good enough for them... Anyways it was nice but joins the list alongside caviar as food that is proper snooty and posh but I don't get the hype. 

Looking forward I'm not sure where our crazy freewheelin' lifestyle is headed but I'm sure it is a place that's wonderful yet decadently restrained... Like our budget. This is a new reinvigorated Anjum, one who brunches weekly, attends sporting events whilst glistening like a vampire. So yeah, adapting to being less frugal is going okay but there are still some hurdles...

When colleagues asked what I was most looking forward to when I got back to Blighty for the Christmas holidays, I said after friends, family and more Brexit talk it was the grade F chicken and chips for £1. I've missed it, strange as it may seem. Also, I’m off to Tonbridge in a couple of days and look forward to getting a personal £2 pizza from Pizza Go Go near Tonbridge Station and going to Oriental Buffet to eat my body weight in chicken wings! See, it’s not all spas and truffle oils, I’m still ‘hood!

LINK- Life in Saudi Arabia 3 Month On

LINK- An English Geek in Saudi Arabia

LINK- Video Gaming In Saudi Arabia

Huge Manga Exhibition Starts This Weekend at British Museum

The British Museum is one of my favourite places in the world; not only is it a magnificent building but it houses some of the worlds greatest treasures. I go there every month at least for a couple of hours to take in the wonders of the ancient world.

On another note, I’ve been a HUGE manga fan for about 30 years now. Back when I got into it in the late 80s, manga and anime were not as prevalent as it is now in the West, so to see its emergence and cultural impact has been fascinating for me. When I started this blog wayyy back in 2013 my very first post was an influence map and manga features quite heavily.

The influence map I created way back in 2013.

The influence map I created way back in 2013.

The British Museum is about to run the biggest manga exhibition in the world, outisde of Japanand I am so there for it! The exhibition runs from 23rd May to 26th August 2019. In their own words:

Immersive and playful, the exhibition will explore manga’s global appeal and cultural crossover, showcasing original Japanese manga and its influence across the globe, from anime to ‘cosplay’ dressing up. This influential art form entertains, inspires and challenges – and is brought to life like never before in this ground-breaking exhibition.

I hope to be going this weekend and will provide all the photos, details and review. I can’t wait!

LINK- British Museum Manga Exhibition Tickets

LINK- Good Grief, Charlie Brown Exhibition Review