It's that time of year where many of us reflect on the passing of time. Successes and failures; we look back at the goals and targets we set ourselves this time last year and see if we have accomplished what we wanted to do, become what we wanted to become etc.
My resolution from last year was to meet and understand people better. This might make me sound socially awkward but, to be honest, after lockdown and the isolation that entailed, I have found that I’m a lot less confident than I used to be. That might be to do with my age too as I’m now middle aged.
On an analogue level, I continued to play in the local weekday football league, where I would participate in weekly games with my fellow dads and lads. We started a team during lockdown about a year and a bit ago and it's been great to build relationships with these guys as I find that it's become more difficult to build friendships as I've got older. It could be that my older friends, the ones I've known since school/college etc, have kept me safe in a walled garden of my own making; stepping away can be a challenge when you are comfortable. It's been strange as I've had to take pause and slow down in conversation and open up a little more as these newer friends don't know me that well and nor I them. We have no shared history, so it's like building the structures of friendship one brick at a time.
Also, I read a lot biographies and autobiographies over the past 12 months… and I mean a lot! Yes, these were often of celebrities who wanted to show their best self and were not your typical lay person but it has been interesting to see how candid they were and actually critical of their own actions or inactions. I read the autobiographies of Oliver Stone, Cassandra Peterson (Elvira), Tegan and Sara, Mel B, Louis Theroux, Reggie Fils-Aime, Simon Reeve, and Seth Rogan as well as the biographies of Peter Falk (Columbo), William Blake and Robin Williams. As well as this I listened to a lot of audiobooks on people including the excellent Dermot O’Leary podcast People, Just People and the perennial favourite Desert Island Discs. I learned a lot from these and, even though many of these people lived vastly different lives to mine, I found many shared the same worries, concerns and dreams as I and, I assume, many other people have.
Finally, I also got into philosophy, specifically Moral Philosophy. I studied Anthropology at university but have always had an interest in the human condition, the reason why we are here and all the other light fluffy stuff that makes me such a great conversationalist at parties. However, the idea of reading thousands of years of philosophy and ethics is daunting so, as well as reading some books recently by Ernest Becker, Rumi and Noam Chomsky to get myself caught up, I read a couple of books by Mike Schur (creator of The Good Place, The Office (US version), Parks and Rec and so much more.) What I gained was a distillation of thousands of years of moral philosophy and ethics in a couple of handy tomes. My main takeaway was of T. M. Scanlon's Contractualism which posits that we should act upon rules that others could not reasonably refuse i.e. create and follow reasonable rules that are built on interpersonal relationships. This is a good way to think about society as, generally, people need people need people.
Unfortunately, the prevalence of the Selfish Gene theory alongside Hobbesian philosophy, makes many of us believe that the world is a dark and horrible place where only the strongest can survive: It’s dog eat dog out there. We can sometimes form a poor view of our fellow man which create the Mean World Syndrome that is often supported by the rolling 24 hour news coverage of terrible acts committed by apparenty terrible people. Even though we are currently living in one of the most peaceful times, where poverty has dropped substantially and the average life expectancy has increased, we think the world is going to ‘hell in a handcart.’ However, that is patently not true.
So, I know I'm rambling somewhat but I suppose my central message is of peace, growth and transcendence. I believe that people must come together as there is an intersectionality where the betterment of the state of the world is for the benefit of everyone and not just the few. Another person can change your life without remaining a permanent part of it. In fact, people can leave an imprint or act as a catalyst for (re)discovering something about ourselves. I've started a process of deep reflection and self-examination. The Greek philosopher Socrates said, ‘Know Thyself’ and an essential part of knowing yourself must be to recognise the limits of your own wisdom and understanding- knowing what you do genuinely know and knowing what you have yet to learn. Boomers, Gen X, Millenials, Gen Z or however people choose to classify themselves (or are labelled)- we can make the world a better place by coming from a place of understanding and learning from each other.
Anyways, that’s my two cents worth… have a grand new year one and all!
LINK- How to be Perfect: The Correct Answer to Every Moral Question by Mike Schur- Book Review
LINK- The Good Place and Philosophy- Book Review
LINK- Utopia for Realists- Book Review
LINK- Humankind: A Hopeful History- Book Review
LINK- The Future Starts Here: An Optimistic Guide to What Comes Next- Book Review