High Tea and High Times at the Riyadh Globe
A couple of weeks ago I ‘celebrated’ my 39th birthday. I say celebrated but it was a weird one to be honest. My lovely wife had signed us both up for the school staff talent show a few weeks ago. She put us in for the Bollywood dancing, just to buck the stereotype, but then got shy after a couple of sessions and bailed leaving me in the group. I felt guilty as the numbers in the group were low so I stayed and on my birthday I performed on a proper stage to a paying audience of 750 school parents, pupils and peers in the evening. It was a great experience and I had a lot of fun but it wasn’t what I would have planned to do on my birthday. When the show had finished it was quite late-ish so I went home and went to bed. So yeah, a weird but memorable birthday for sure.
The cakes and snacks on offer were wonderful.
I think my wife was feeling guilty as later on that week she WhatApped our friends and arranged a fancy high tea at the Al Faisaliah Tower in Riyadh. For people not in the know, which I’m guessing is pretty much everyone as it’s not that famous a building outside of Riyadh, the tower is a giant pyramid with a globe stuck in near the top. It’s a beautiful but unconventional looking building, but what it promises is an unrivaled 360 degree view of the city and a perfect place to view the sunset whilst eating delicious food. So, what’s not to like, eh?
Well, after navigating the nightmarish roadworks that had blocked off most of the access points to the area we arrived at the front of the tower. A valet offered to park the Kia next to the latest, shiniest BMWs, Bentleys and Bugattis and I knew then that these were my people and I’d fit riiiiight in…
Entering the tower with my helium filled Elmo birthday balloon, we stepped onto the red carpet and I felt every bit the star my mother thinks I am. Maybe they’d heard about my amazing turn at the Staff Talent Show? We went through the x-ray tunnel and metal detector and my balloon was confiscated. Elmo is a code red apparently, or maybe they don’t want people to get high off the helium.
We then entered a cylindrical lift that felt like something out of a James Bond villains lair, all glass and chrome. A dapper concierge swiped his special card to allow the lift to move. We then met another concierge half way up and he swiped his special card to allow us further up into the building, into the plush lounge area. I thought that at the next stop I’d have to give a stool sample, shed some blood or sacrifice a lamb to be allowed in but luckily that was not required as we were finally there.
The panoramic view was instantly amazing. The sun shone on the Kingdom Tower which stood right in front of us; a bottle opener shaped building created by an architect with a ‘dry’ sense of humour! The other towering skyscrapers loomed large and the Mondrian-like grid road system was clear for all to see. The view was breathtaking and well worth the price of the 35 quid admission.
As we settled into our chairs, the waiting staff filed our glasses with fizzy water and loaded the table with serving towers laden with a selection of cakes, scones, chocolates, blinis (that’s small pancakes with fancy toppings) and savoury amuse-bouches (that’s small fancy food that tastes delicious). I was impressed as the food was scrumpdiddlyumptious but there were no cucumber, egg and cress or salmon paste finger sandwiches in sight. Worse still you had to go make your own tea! Well, that’s just not cricket is it? In all fairness they did have a tea caddy area with proper posh tea in their own linen-type teabags and a hot water urn but it felt weird making my own tea at a high tea.
However, this was more than made up by the fact that they had an international buffet going on. There was food from Japan; sushi, China; spring rolls, India; samosas and Germany; some savoury pastries and cookies. There was also a pimp chocolate fountain with a variety of foods and fruits you could skewer. So all in all, a very good variety of food that catered for all needs… except for those who like vegetables. It was a very beige tea, which I don’t mind on occasion, but for those wanting a rainbow plate of food jog on son…
So, as the sun set over the 3 or so hours we were there, my friends and I enjoyed the magnificent sunset and ate our fill. There were lots of laughs and lively discussions about work and life in Riyadh. My daughters loved the whole thing and ate their fill of chocolate covered fruit and marshmallow. The staff were very sweet and attentive and my daughters danced, ate and made friends with some of the other kids there.
The time whizzed by and by 6pm we bid a fond adieu to the place and made our way back downstairs, collecting the Elmo balloon on the way.
I have to say that my wife outdid herself by arranging this. Now I have to think of a way to repay her on her birthday. Maybe I’ll book her in for a standup session at the local comedy bar and then take her for a fancy Indian meal after… I’ve got a few months to figure out how to make her birthday as memorable as mine was with a sucker punch of an event first and then a sweetener.
LINK- Reflecting on Life in Saudi Arabia After 5 Months
LINK- Life in Saudi Arabia 3 Month On